Deepen Your Relationships, Episode #78, 8-25-20

The root cause of conflict in relationship communication frequently isn’t what IS said but rather, what ISN’T said. Kelly and Maria share tips for improving communication to bring greater understanding and intimacy to all types of relationship. 

Contact Kelly and Maria at hello@championsmojo.com.

Episode Topics and Mentions

Good communication

Closeness/Intimacy

John M. Gottman

Politics

Stonewalling

“Put yourself on the other person’s map.”

Life coaching

Bi-romantic

Gary Chapman, The Five Love Languages

Harville Hendrix, Getting the Love You Want

Two Types of Communication 

1. Closed Heart Communication - includes the Four Horsemen that poison relationships: 

 a. Criticism: When one person implies that there is something wrong with the other person. The other person will most likely feel attacked and respond defensively. 

 b. Defensiveness: When the person responding to a perceived criticism counter attacks with another criticism or plays the innocent victim.

 c. Contempt: When one person puts themselves on a superior moral high ground or holds the other with disgust. 

 d. Stonewalling: When one person withdraws from the conversation either physically or energetically.

2. Appreciative Communication -- coming from a lens of appreciation for another person’s point of view and asks these questions:

 a. What? 

 b. When? 

 c. How? 

 d. Who?

Five Love Languages

 1. Words of affirmation

 2. Quality time

 3. Giving/receiving gifts

 4. Acts of service

 5. Physical touch

Quote of the Week

“The number one problem, though I prefer the word challenge, in marriage is indeed effective communication.” -- Laura Young

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Email us at HELLO@ChampionsMojo.com. Opinions discussed are not medical advice, please seek a medical professional for your own health concerns.